Posted on 06/07/2005 7:59pm
I was going to watch PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN last night but as I was about to put the DVD into the player, I noticed that the movie is about 2 1/2 hours long. It was already 9 pm and if I don't get to bed before 11 pm, I'm a real grouch in the morning when the alarm goes off at 5:30 a.m. for work. So, I watched UNTOLD STORIES OF THE ER instead and went to bed. I really want to see the movie, though, because I've always had fantasies about sailing the high seas and looking for buried treasure.
Whenever I think of "treasure", I think of "L". I met "L" the summer of 1997. He was a friend of a friend who had seen my photo and wanted to meet me. The friend told me and since I respected her, I told her that it was ok to let him know I'd entertain any conversation he wanted to initiate.
"L" and I would meet in a chat room in the on-line forum I belonged to and we'd flirt a little, joke a little, etc. He seemed nice enough and we quickly established a rapport. We even had this "private joke" about how our friend expected us to meet, fall madly in love and get married. Cute stuff. The hopeful romantic in me found those things endearing. We quickly moved from chat room to telephone and he seemed like a decent guy. Then, our mutual friend announced that "L" was coming for a three-day weekend visit and suggested (HIGHLY suggested) that it was time that we met. She was so sure that things were gonna be perfect, wonderful, straight out of a Disney cartoon with flowers sighing, birds singing and rainbows appearing. It was very stressful because I'm kind of shy when I first meet someone and it takes me some time to warm up. The thought of meeting someone under the watchful eyes of a friend who was so insistent that things were going to be wonderful was even more stressful.
Our friend and I agreed that a little informal meeting at my place followed by a trek to a nearby park for hiking, a picnic, etc would be fairly fun and a great way to get to know each other. Early on a Saturday, "L" showed up with our mutual friend, her husband, and her two rather rambunctious children. "L" wasn't what I expected. I had never seen his photo and had relied on my friend that he was a "good catch." I'm not exactly shallow but like everyone I do have certain things that I'm attracted to and certain things I'm not. I wasn't attracted to "L". There was just something about him that gave me weird vibes. I tried to not let it show. I was friendly and polite and hoped that as I got to know him better, we'd click more. I'm about the benefit of the doubt. There have been guys I've met who didn't do anything for me until I had a chance to get to know them better, pick their brains, see if they can make me laugh. I hoped, for our friend's sake that we'd click a little. We didn't.
Under the watchful gaze of our friend, I pretended to be having a wonderful time. I didn't want to hurt her feelings or "L"'s. I just figured I'd soldier through the weekend and politely say things didn't work out. "L" and I made small talk, took a hike in the woods, took some pictures, even tried holding hands while we explored some caves, but nothing. No spark. I'd try to get some space, but our friend kept pushing us to be together. I kept hoping for a moment alone with her so I could tell her that we weren't clicking. On the way back to my apartment, our friend asked "L" what "our" plans were for the evening. I was exhausted and grimy from the woods adventure. I just wanted to go home and go to bed. "L said that he had something "special" planned. So, we agreed that he'd return in a few hours to pick me up. "Dress nice," he said. In front of our friend, he was witty and charming, but then when we were alone, he was creepy, broody and not very charming.
When he showed up three hours later, he was still wearing the same dirty jeans and t-shirt he had worn on the hike. When I opened the door, he said, "I have a surprise for you!" and yanked off his shirt. Written on his chest were the words "TREASURE TRAIL" with an arrow pointing downward. I must have looked puzzled because he said, "Follow the trail, find your treasure." Then, he waggled his eyebrows. I just stared at him, then laughed nervously. Hello. Didn't we just spend a miserable afternoon together? What part of the awkwardness, the non-clicking, the inability to make conversation, the tense moments alone did he miss? When he realized I wasn't finding his "treasure trail" amusing, he put on his shirt and said, "Let's go to dinner." Being a trooper, I went. Then, after dinner, he said, "I used to live here. Do you mind if we drive around a little?" I said I didn't mind. I was a much more timid person back then. So, we drove past the apartment he used to share with some guys in the scary part of town, then we drove past the gas station where he used to get gas when he lived in the scary part of town, then we ended up in this residential area near the scary part of town and as we approached a house, he slowed down and turned off his headlights. We creeped by the house and I asked what was up and he said, "My ex-wife lives there." EX-WIFE??? THAT little bit had never come up before. We circled the house three times and each time, he would make some nasty comment about her. I finally asked "L" to take me home. I'd had enough. When we got back to my apartment, he walked me to my door and at the door, he said, "Can I come in for awhile? We don't have to do anything you don't want to." I just looked at him and said, "I have to work in the morning. I'm really tired." He said ok and left. My friend was rather disappointed (major understatement) that there were no wedding bells in our future, but after awhile, she stopped talking about it and I stopped having nightmares about creepy men offering me a one-way trip down the treasure trail. I don't even want to think about what kind of hidden treasure he had down there.
Moral of this story: DO NOT let anyone ever fix you up with someone unless you get a full background check, three references from previous relationships and a signed affidavit that nothing creepy will happen on the date.
I was going to watch PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN last night but as I was about to put the DVD into the player, I noticed that the movie is about 2 1/2 hours long. It was already 9 pm and if I don't get to bed before 11 pm, I'm a real grouch in the morning when the alarm goes off at 5:30 a.m. for work. So, I watched UNTOLD STORIES OF THE ER instead and went to bed. I really want to see the movie, though, because I've always had fantasies about sailing the high seas and looking for buried treasure.
Whenever I think of "treasure", I think of "L". I met "L" the summer of 1997. He was a friend of a friend who had seen my photo and wanted to meet me. The friend told me and since I respected her, I told her that it was ok to let him know I'd entertain any conversation he wanted to initiate.
"L" and I would meet in a chat room in the on-line forum I belonged to and we'd flirt a little, joke a little, etc. He seemed nice enough and we quickly established a rapport. We even had this "private joke" about how our friend expected us to meet, fall madly in love and get married. Cute stuff. The hopeful romantic in me found those things endearing. We quickly moved from chat room to telephone and he seemed like a decent guy. Then, our mutual friend announced that "L" was coming for a three-day weekend visit and suggested (HIGHLY suggested) that it was time that we met. She was so sure that things were gonna be perfect, wonderful, straight out of a Disney cartoon with flowers sighing, birds singing and rainbows appearing. It was very stressful because I'm kind of shy when I first meet someone and it takes me some time to warm up. The thought of meeting someone under the watchful eyes of a friend who was so insistent that things were going to be wonderful was even more stressful.
Our friend and I agreed that a little informal meeting at my place followed by a trek to a nearby park for hiking, a picnic, etc would be fairly fun and a great way to get to know each other. Early on a Saturday, "L" showed up with our mutual friend, her husband, and her two rather rambunctious children. "L" wasn't what I expected. I had never seen his photo and had relied on my friend that he was a "good catch." I'm not exactly shallow but like everyone I do have certain things that I'm attracted to and certain things I'm not. I wasn't attracted to "L". There was just something about him that gave me weird vibes. I tried to not let it show. I was friendly and polite and hoped that as I got to know him better, we'd click more. I'm about the benefit of the doubt. There have been guys I've met who didn't do anything for me until I had a chance to get to know them better, pick their brains, see if they can make me laugh. I hoped, for our friend's sake that we'd click a little. We didn't.
Under the watchful gaze of our friend, I pretended to be having a wonderful time. I didn't want to hurt her feelings or "L"'s. I just figured I'd soldier through the weekend and politely say things didn't work out. "L" and I made small talk, took a hike in the woods, took some pictures, even tried holding hands while we explored some caves, but nothing. No spark. I'd try to get some space, but our friend kept pushing us to be together. I kept hoping for a moment alone with her so I could tell her that we weren't clicking. On the way back to my apartment, our friend asked "L" what "our" plans were for the evening. I was exhausted and grimy from the woods adventure. I just wanted to go home and go to bed. "L said that he had something "special" planned. So, we agreed that he'd return in a few hours to pick me up. "Dress nice," he said. In front of our friend, he was witty and charming, but then when we were alone, he was creepy, broody and not very charming.
When he showed up three hours later, he was still wearing the same dirty jeans and t-shirt he had worn on the hike. When I opened the door, he said, "I have a surprise for you!" and yanked off his shirt. Written on his chest were the words "TREASURE TRAIL" with an arrow pointing downward. I must have looked puzzled because he said, "Follow the trail, find your treasure." Then, he waggled his eyebrows. I just stared at him, then laughed nervously. Hello. Didn't we just spend a miserable afternoon together? What part of the awkwardness, the non-clicking, the inability to make conversation, the tense moments alone did he miss? When he realized I wasn't finding his "treasure trail" amusing, he put on his shirt and said, "Let's go to dinner." Being a trooper, I went. Then, after dinner, he said, "I used to live here. Do you mind if we drive around a little?" I said I didn't mind. I was a much more timid person back then. So, we drove past the apartment he used to share with some guys in the scary part of town, then we drove past the gas station where he used to get gas when he lived in the scary part of town, then we ended up in this residential area near the scary part of town and as we approached a house, he slowed down and turned off his headlights. We creeped by the house and I asked what was up and he said, "My ex-wife lives there." EX-WIFE??? THAT little bit had never come up before. We circled the house three times and each time, he would make some nasty comment about her. I finally asked "L" to take me home. I'd had enough. When we got back to my apartment, he walked me to my door and at the door, he said, "Can I come in for awhile? We don't have to do anything you don't want to." I just looked at him and said, "I have to work in the morning. I'm really tired." He said ok and left. My friend was rather disappointed (major understatement) that there were no wedding bells in our future, but after awhile, she stopped talking about it and I stopped having nightmares about creepy men offering me a one-way trip down the treasure trail. I don't even want to think about what kind of hidden treasure he had down there.
Moral of this story: DO NOT let anyone ever fix you up with someone unless you get a full background check, three references from previous relationships and a signed affidavit that nothing creepy will happen on the date.
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