The Holiday Spirit

Have a holly, jolly Christmas;
It's the best time of the year
I don't know if there'll be snow
But have a cup of cheer

Have a holly, jolly Christmas;
And when you walk down the street
Say Hello to friends you know
And everyone you meet

Oh
Ho
The mistletoe
Hung where you can see;

Somebody waits for you;
Kiss her once for me
Have a holly jolly Christmas

I know what you may be thinking -- "Girl, it's only August, why in the world are you posting about Christmas?"

Well, anyone who knows me well knows that I generally do not enjoy the Christmas holiday season.  I try to get all of my "required" (family and closest friends) holiday shopping done by November so that I do not have to deal with stores or anything remotely ho ho holly jolly from November until the end of the year.  Yes, yes -- the woman who enjoys being a child on occasion does not like Christmas.  

The reason why I'm posting about it now is because I've had a couple of Christmas-themed dreams lately -- mostly about my company having a Christmas party.  A nice, dress up, go out and have fun with co-workers, get a little loopy, drink a little alcohol Christmas party.  Will this happen?  Probably not.  Would it help my mood if we did?  Maybe.

I wasn't always this way.  I enjoyed Christmas when it was magical and innocent and truly about fellowship, love and celebration of life.  I enjoyed Christmas when I could make gifts for people and have them appreciate the effort, creativity and love that went into the gift and not get a "Oh, you made me a gift" disappointed response as the person shook the gift bag hoping that money or a gift card would fall out.  I enjoyed Christmas until my nephews became greedy little sh*ts who turn their nose up at arts and crafts supplies and ask me where the overly expensive and not really needed electronics gift is.

I enjoyed Christmas until I got a job in retail in 1996. When you work retail during the holiday season, you get to see some pretty ugly sides of people.  People arguing and bickering and being aggressive.  People rationalizing things they can't afford and don't need.  People assigning a dollar sign to what a person's value is.  "Gosh, I need to get Susan something for Christmas.  I think I like her exactly $25 worth."  (THE OFFICE even did an episode about the bad boss trying to decide how much he liked people when it came to establishing a purchasing limit on holiday gifts.)

For me, I think the holiday should not be so commercialized.  I should not be asked to give $X towards a holiday gift for a boss that I had no say in buying or choosing.  Yes, they did this last year at my company.  Sent me an email two weeks before Christmas when my money was tight TELLING me that my share of a super expensive holiday gift for the department manager was $XX.XX.  Not - "Hey, would you like to give something?"  Not "We're thinking of getting...".  No.  It was "We bought this.  You owe this."   I told them politely that I had greedy little nephews to buy for and my money was already spoken for.  This was not a lie.  My part time job was over and I didn't have any extra money lying around.  So, one of my co-workers "put in" for me and then after Christmas was over, demanded repayment.  This did not sit well with me.

Before you think I'm a total grinch, I'm not.  I really am not.  

You see, I believe in sharing all year round.  I will not think twice about picking up some breakfast for someone, or covering a lunch tab, or grabbing something from the vending machine for someone.  I will buy things throughout the year to tell people I care, enjoy them, celebrate them, love them.  I do not need a date on a calendar in December to remind me that I like someone and need to buy them something.  I'd rather go hog-wild for someone's birthday which truly celebrates them and how much they are loved than to stress out over the perfect Christmas gift.

I try to be a trooper.  I try to be a team player.  I try to grin and bear it.

I keep hoping that "this year" will be the year I am able to feel and express joy for an entire season.

Last year, I almost made it.   Almost.  Until the "you owe me" thing for the holiday gift.

So, tell me -  can you even remember what you got for Christmas last year?  Huh? Can you? I can't.

However, can you remember the last time someone did something nice for you or gave you something just because they thought you were special?  I can.  

For me, those things are far more important and cherished than being told "HAVE a holly jolly Christmas, dammit!"